Dads can be great mothers, too, if they have to be. The difficulty for Dads is that there's little understanding of fatherhood until after it happens. To men it seems that women are pre-programmed to deal with the love for a baby; that the baby should impact the father so greatly comes as an amazing surprise. Then to lose the baby is a trauma beyond expression, and Dads need the serious help that recognises and understands these difficulties.